feelin empty

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feelin empty

Post by moegami on Tue 23 Dec 2014 - 3:16

Sorry for the lackluster title, all I'm really feeling is empty right now.

I'm really getting personal with you guys here. The only other thing I've talked about in the bar is my internet life, and this is going to transcend into real life. I'd like to get to know you guys better. I feel like I've taken a lot of favors from you guys and really given nothing in return. I'm really grateful for this forum and all of you guys, but I digress.

The past few months have been really rough on me. I have really severe anxiety which causes me to have panic attacks a lot. School gets stressful, I freak out, and then I'm miserable. I have this girl, Nicole, who I've had a thing with for a long time and I care about her deeply but our relationship gets rough and when I don't know what to do I have panic attacks. It's just been getting progressively worse. Not long ago I sought out help and have since been medicated for my anxiety, but it doesn't feel like it's helping.

So here's where I'm really opening up to you guys. I'll be honest, I have bit of a problem with substance abuse. I find it hard to get through panic attacks or depression without taking some sort of pill, drinking, or smoking. I blame myself really. I tried to act like I wouldn't get hooked on this shit and now I find myself not being able to fall asleep sober. I hope this doesn't change you guys' perception of me. I still am dedicated to the things that mean a lot to me in life, like my website and this zelda hack. It's just hard to deal with my emotions.

Even now I'm high. I was having a rough night and balling my eyes out so in desperation I drank a bottle of cheratussin which has codeine in it. Gave me a splitting stomach ache but at least I felt something other than empty. Every day I wake up with these ridiculous bags under my eyes and I'm afraid of what I've become.

I've just been wishing for something amazing to happen. Something unexpected, that'll astonish and surprise me. To take me out of this depression. Something new that'll change the course of my life. Unimaginable happenings. I wish so bad for something new and amazing in this world.

I know I must sound super pretentious and dumb, like I said hopefully this doesn't change your perception of me as a user but I just really needed to say something and hopefully you guys can provide your 2 cents.

This is a nice album I listen to when I'm sad.

Since : 2013-07-04


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Re: feelin empty

Post by Trovsky on Tue 23 Dec 2014 - 4:04

I've never been down the road of substance abuse but I did have anxiety attacks in the past, I still use medication from my doctor which helps. I do not think less of you but think more of you for reaching out to somebody. It always helps to talk to someone when you feel and it is always okay to cry; even if "it's not manly to do it", it is the healthiest option as opposed to holding it in.

Substance abuse is bad; I don't even drink coffee because I heard that's even addicting. After trying a prescribed medication from my doctor and having suicidal thought at a very young age, the usage of drugs became a very serious to me. At this day and age, a plethora of harmful illegal drugs is more accessible than ever. Coming from a person who has never experienced addiction, I cannot provide much tips except for "QUIT NOW". Your life will greatly improve. I can say that your anxiety attacks will get better.

I will leave you with a little YouTube animation that expresses the situation of drug addiction.

And when you are sad I highly recommend NOT listening to sad music. By listening to sad music, you are trying to remain in the state of sadness. If you want to be a little bit happier, listen to something upbeat, like this:


Since : 2014-04-10

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Re: feelin empty

Post by Erockbrox on Tue 23 Dec 2014 - 5:14

You just have to seriously belief in yourself and give yourself a confidence boost!

Right now you are using a deku stick. Throw that stick away and pick up that Master Sword and hold it in the air.

Anxiety is not easy to overcome, but you have to become strong enough to not let it get you. Just think if you were to fight Gannon with the Level 1 sword and no magic, you might have a panic attack because you are not prepared. However if you train and level up and gain lots of abilities and prepare yourself now you are going against Gannon with full magic and silver arrows! Now Gannon is toast.

In order words, try and be as prepared as you can so that you are not in a situation where panic stuff can happen. Plan everything out and try and make the best decisions that you can.

Since : 2013-02-05

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Re: feelin empty

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